Corporate Bullshit Score Calculator

Finally, a scientifically dubious way to quantify what you already know: your company is full of it. Answer six simple questions and discover your organization's true Bullshit Index.

The Assessment

Drag the sliders to match your corporate reality. Be honest -- we already know the answers are depressing.

How many people attend your average meeting? Include the ones who are "just listening in"

2 (a conversation) 50 (a TED talk nobody asked for)

How many of those people actually need to be there? Be brutally honest. We won't tell HR.

0 (could've been a Slack message) 10 (actual collaboration -- rare)

How many buzzwords does your CEO use per all-hands? "Synergy," "disruption," "north star," "double-click" -- you know the ones

0 (your CEO speaks English) 100 (your CEO IS a LinkedIn post)

How many "pivots" has your company done this year? Each rebrand of the same failed idea counts as one

0 (suspiciously stable) 10 (you're basically a revolving door)

What percentage of your KPIs actually measure anything useful? Vanity metrics don't count, no matter how good they look on dashboards

30%

0% (pure theater) 100% (you might actually be competent)

How many consultants are currently "transforming" your company? Include the ones "on the bench" who still bill full rate

0 (DIY dysfunction) 50 (they outnumber your actual employees)

Corporate Bullshit Score Calculator

The Assessment

Scored Higher Than You'd Like?